


To Exist

by ShootingStarsAtNight



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: A bit of sad fluff too, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Kageyama crying, M/M, Out of Character Kageyama Tobio, Sad Ending, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, idk where this idea came from, kageyama cries, uh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:01:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28082067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShootingStarsAtNight/pseuds/ShootingStarsAtNight
Summary: The sun. His sun.Hinata Shouyou was his sun.But, how does a person exist if the one who helped them exist, doesn’t exist anymore?
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Kageyama Tobio, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	To Exist

To Kageyama, Hinata was the sun that reigned over him from above the clouds.

He was far, far away from him on a journey Kageyama burned to fully comprehend. He still doesn’t understand.

Kageyama’s grown to see the world through brighter lenses, and wider scapes that even through all his time existing, only ever really existed when Hinata showed him how.

The awareness, and the sting of a spike over the net, and the sting of the first high five he’s ever accepted. Even the sting of his face when he purposely tried to smile, and the way Hinata looked more spooked than he’s ever seen him. 

He was finally existing. 

The smell of sweat, the shouts of utter euphoria when they won a game. It’s carved into memory. He could feel everything.

To Kageyama, Hinata helped him develop a wonder that was so bright like a child’s first time knowing themselves, and seeing. Hearing. Listening. Feeling. Smelling.

The excitement of seeing everything work together, just like Kurasuno all together. 

Unstoppable forces of nature, and waves that moved him forward. Winds that held him up. Skies that pushed his limits to fly. He would heed their wishes with all his arms and legs could give, because he was finally existing.

He evolved from a wilting plant at the mercy of a harsh reality to a budding flower.

Hinata sifted through the chapters of his life. Through all the pain, excitement, love and apathy. Pulled him with his small hand through the tough spots whether he ever knew, or ever will.

Hinata saw right into the rush Kageyama felt when he thought he had to win all by himself, and shattered every misconception that stood there like wise pillars in his mind. He, Kageyama Tobio, was finally existing because of Hinata Shouyou.

The sun. His sun.

Hinata Shouyou was his sun.

But, how does a person exist if the one who helped them exist, doesn’t exist anymore?

What do you do when the sun fades like any other star that dies in the sky? 

Kageyama Tobio doesn’t know the answer, and no matter how many tears he lays on the ground in front of him, and the way it blurs in his wet eyes...

Hinata’s grave won’t answer him.

He can see clearly the pink flowers around Hinata’s grave. 

He can still hear the sound of Hinata’s scream when the car came skidding towards his short form-

Breathe.

He can smell the tar of the wet roads not to far away. It’s raining, like it was that day. A painful reminder with every drop.

He can feel the ugly darkness swelling in his own chest.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

“Shouyou, love, partner, best friend, and everything.” He says. He names all the things he was too scared to say when Hinata had eyes to sparkle,and lips to say it back. He says them over and over in his head, like a mantra, and hopes that Hinata can hear him in the stars.

_”Honey”_

His voice is hollow from lack of use and his face contorts with every sob that takes him over like a ghost.

_”My love”_

“Shouyou, what do I do now?”

Hinata, and his loud mouth is dead silent. No retorts. No pouts. No exclamation of confusion. No lousy nicknames at all.

_”My angel”_

Hinata won’t answer him.

How did this happen. How?

_”I’m sorry”_

Kageyama rests a volleyball down on the dirt, and bites his lip, wiping the tears that fall on it.

He screams.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on a whim. I hate myself.
> 
> This is my first haikyuu fic e v e r and it’s sad. Sigh. My life is angst istg-
> 
> The pain. The p a i n.
> 
> This is kinda a draft but I might edit later, or leave as is. Ain’t sure yet-
> 
> Comment if you liked it tho!
> 
> We can cry together, or laugh. Whatever floats ur boats brothers and sisters.


End file.
